Tuesday, 21 July 2026

Question Paper

The government doesn't fear terrorists.

Terrorists make excellent headlines.


It doesn't fear wars.


Wars arrive with flags, anthems,

and enough cameras

to make destruction look like history.


It doesn't even fear hunger.


Hungry people are too busy

counting their last meals

to count who took the first one.


No.


The government fears classrooms.


Because classrooms have a dangerous habit

of creating people who read before they obey.


A child with a question paper

is more dangerous than an adult with a slogan.

Because slogans tell you what to think.

Questions ask you why.


And why

has buried more empires

than weapons ever did.


In a country

where generations escaped 

famine, debt, discrimination, and surnames

that arrived before they did,

education was never just education.


It was a ladder built by people

who were never allowed inside the building.


Every examination was a small rebellion.

Every piece of paper earned in a classroom

was proof

that destiny could be negotiated.


Which is why 

nothing terrifies power

more than a child who believes

their future belongs to them.


Because a child

who believes they own tomorrow

eventually asks who sold yesterday.



Every dictatorship begins the same way.


Not by burning books.

That comes later.


First,

it convinces people

that questions are disrespect.


Raise your hand?

Suspicious.

Raise your voice?

Seditious.

Raise an eyebrow?

Anti-national.

Raise your child

to think?

Now that's dangerous.


We tell children there are no stupid questions.


Then they grow up.


Turns out there are.

Mostly the ones asked loudly.

Outside Parliament.

Inside classrooms.

Anywhere a microphone

can accidentally hear the truth.


The funny thing about a baton

is that it has only one answer.

It keeps repeating it

until the question forgets why it was asked.


History teachers must be exhausted.

Every few decades, they have to explain

how every empire made the same mistake.


They mistook their own echo for applause.

They mistook silence for agreement.

They mistook fear for loyalty.


Funny.


We celebrate the people who questioned an empire.

Then punish the people who question a government.


As though

a government and a country

were the same thing.


They are not.


A country

is the child who studies beneath a broken tube light

because darkness is cheaper than failure.

The farmer praying to clouds

that arrive everywhere except his field.

The student carrying an answer sheet

like a lottery ticket written by someone else.


A government is merely the hand borrowing the pen.


And history has always been cruel

to people who mistake

holding the pen for owning the paper.


Because eventually, the question changes.


Not:

"Will you obey?"

But:

"Why did you think

you were allowed

to ask?"


You can arrest the student.

Confiscate the notebook.

Break the pencil.

Rewrite the syllabus.

Erase the names.

Polish the statues.


But the question?


The question has already graduated.


It lives in every person who watched.

Every person who remembered.

Every person who quietly wondered

if the answer sheet was ever meant for them.


Because that's the problem with question papers.


They were never for the students.

They were always for the examiner.



And governments, no matter how powerful,

eventually discover the most terrifying truth about examinations:


The person holding the pen

is not always

the person giving the marks.


History has been invigilating governments for centuries.


Every empire entered the examination hall

believing it had written history.


Centuries later,

history arrived with a red pen,

and failed every answer

they spent centuries,

forcing generations to memorize, 

until the lie no longer needed to be defended, 

for, 

it had learned to answer in everyone's handwriting.

Monday, 20 July 2026

Name. Place. Animal. Thing.

Drawers

are strange places.


Things go there

when they are not ready

to disappear.


Not because

they are valuable.

But because 

sometimes,

throwing something away

requires admitting

you were wrong

about why you kept it.




Twelve watches.


I keep buying them

as if one of them

will eventually confess

where all the time went.


They all work.

Every single one.

Which somehow

makes it worse.


A broken watch

would have been merciful.

It would admit

that something ended.


These keep ticking,

quietly proving

that time does not stop

just because

someone inside it

has already expired.




A sketch pad.


Pages of faces.


I have always trusted

black and white

more than reality.


Colours are dishonest.

They know how to seduce.

They paint over wounds.

They make corpses look alive

from a distance.


But monochrome

does not negotiate.

Every wrinkle

becomes history.

Every shadow

becomes confession.

Every face

becomes an autopsy

of everything

it survived.


Some finished.

Some abandoned.

Some staring back at me

like people I knew

before they were dissected

and served as memories.


Perhaps that is why

I keep drawing faces.


Not because

I want to remember

how people look.

But because

I want to know

what remains

after everything

they spent their lives

pretending to be

is removed.




Three sticks

of charcoal.


The only things I own

that understand

how darkness

can be dragged

across a surface

and somehow become

something worth looking at.


Perhaps that is why

I never trusted light

as much as transformation.


Light reveals.

Darkness creates.


And sometimes,

darkness creates

better things

than the people

who escaped it.




A stack of origamis.


Animals.

Or whatever remained

after my hands

failed to remember

what animals

were supposed to become.

Although my brain

remembered

every fragile detail.


A bird

with wings folded wrong.

A wolf

that looks more afraid

than dangerous.

A horse

whose legs

forgot the purpose

of running.


I never corrected them.


There is something honest

about creatures

that carry

the fingerprints

of their maker's failures.


Perfect things

only prove

someone followed instructions.


Broken things

reveal

who was holding

the paper.




Pens.


Too many.


Some expensive.

Some stolen.

Some collected

from places

I no longer remember.


All waiting

for a sentence

important enough

to deserve them.


A fountain pen.


Reserved

for words

that need to pretend

they are permanent.


Funny,

how humans invented

permanent ink

while spending their entire lives

trying to erase themselves.




A passport.


Full of stamps.


Evidence

that I crossed borders.

None

that I arrived.


I carry proof

of everywhere

I escaped from.


Apparently,

the world is large enough

to run across continents

but small enough

to always find yourself

waiting at the destination.




And somewhere beneath everything,

a crooked nail.


I don't know

what it belonged to.


But I keep it.


Because perhaps

everything deserves

one last chance

to become useful.


Even broken things.

Especially broken things.

Especially the ones

that no longer remember

what they were supposed

to hold together.




The drawer

is full of them.


Objects.

Ideas.

Dreams.


Failed experiments

with human skin.

Versions of myself

I started building

and abandoned

halfway through.




Every night,

I open it.


Not because

I need anything.

Not because

I expect something inside

to return.


But because

I need evidence

that I once believed

there was something

worth constructing.


The watches

are still ticking.

The pages

are still waiting.

The charcoal

still understands darkness.

The animals

still pretend

they were meant

to be alive.

The pens

still believe

there is something

left to write.




I envy them.


The objects.


At least they get

to remain unfinished.


Humans are crueler.


We call unfinished things

failures

and unfinished people

potential.




Then I close it.


Slowly.

Carefully.


Like shutting

the lid

of a coffin

that remembers

the shape

of its resident.


Because some things

do not need

to be thrown away.

They only need

to be kept long enough

for us to forget

why we kept them.




The drawer

is not a place

where unfinished things wait

to become whole.


It is where

failed versions of ourselves

go

to die quietly.


And perhaps

that is the cruelest truth

about broken things.


They do not always need fixing.


Sometimes,

they only need

a dark enough place

where nobody asks

what they were supposed

to become.




Every night,

I open the drawer.


Not because

I am searching

for something.


But because

for a few seconds,

the watches still tick,

the faces still breathe,

the distorted animals

still remember flight,

and the broken pieces

still have the audacity

to pretend

they belong somewhere.




Then I close it.


Slowly.


Because even abandoned things

deserve privacy

when they are dying.




And tomorrow,

I will open it again.


Not because I miss them.

Not because I love them.


But because I need to know

whether the drawer

is still full

of things I abandoned


or whether,

somewhere between

the watches,

the charcoal,

the broken animals,

and the unfinished faces,


I finally found

the only thing

I was ever trying

to throw away.


Myself.


Unfortunately,

I was the only thing

I abandoned

without ever putting down.

Sunday, 19 July 2026

Stranger Stranger

Strangers arrive

with desire.


It is acquaintances

you should watch closely;

and the conveniences

they mistake

for love.


I would rather

remain a stranger

than become

a creature

of convenience.


I would rather

be desired

than remembered

by routine.



Desire

is a wildfire.


Routine

is what remains

after the smoke

has learned

the furniture.



You and I

could keep

gasping for air


until the fire

recognises us again,

claws through

the ash,

settles

inside our ribs,


and welds shut

the ventricles

we were foolish enough

to leave open,


mistaking

the absence of bleeding

for healing.



Because sometimes

the person you know best

is still

the stranger

you never met.


And, 

I would rather

bury the stranger

than hold on to

a corpse

wearing your name.

Wednesday, 15 July 2026

God Bless You

I met a god today.


Lesser gods and demigods

stood behind,

arrayed into a halo.


Men, women, children,

flocked the streets below,

squealing in joy;

their prayers had been answered.


The god held a microphone,

and told us all,

how choosing his divinity,

worshipping his deity,

was the singular way,

to attain salvation

at the feet

of the country's one true prophet and protector,

at the gates

of bona fide nationalism.


No one questioned

when did the gods

start belonging to geography, 

when did holiness

start looking like

dogs urinating to mark territory.


It's hard to question,

with your mouths full;

last meal of the sacrificial lambs.


As for me,

I was never a believer.

And in a sacred land,

that alone

is blasphemy.


So I breathe

air unblessed,

cursed even,

beneath the god's halo.


Sacrifice is reserved

for the god's favourites.


My life

is my punishment.


Thank god for that.

Monday, 13 July 2026

This Poem Lacks Any Purpose Or Point

Just the other day,

I was minding my own business,

when a stranger walked up to me,

and vehemently insisted on a conversation.


The more they spoke,

the more I wanted 

to slam their head on the wall,

but crimson stains on white walls,

are rather hard to paint over,

unless you call them polka dots

that lost their geometry

somewhere between

violence and interior decoration.


I know this, mostly from lived experience.


So I chose to confront them.

Never a good idea, I tell you.


Apparently it's offensive

if you aren't as much of a dumbfuck

as they are;

apparently that's what they are calling a democracy, these days.


They informed me,

they were uncomfortable in the conversation,

and yet somehow,

couldn't bring all the strength in their bones,

to move a muscle.

Apparently, a morbidly obese vanity does that to you.


Unfortunately, I wasn't unemployed at the time,

I still am not,

but, context matters I've been told.

So, because I had work to do,

people to meet,

and a life that refused to wait for their approval,

I decided to leave, 

while desperately hoping

the previous thirty minutes

could be buried somewhere

between virtual reality and neurological injury.


And just as I was about to reach for the door, 

they stopped me.

They told me,

how important they were.

How accomplished.

How rare.

How they were the continuity of a mutiny.

How they were the missing punctuation in humanity's unfinished sentence.

How they were what would change the world.


I grinned with an oblique lip,

looked them dead in the eye,

and said,

"That's a whole lot of adjectives to decorate biodegradable waste."


I know you are convinced I'm an asshole, 

with a pronounced fetish for violence, 

and you're absolutely correct in your conclusion. 


But remember this, 

had it not been for violence, 

you'd be dead from small pox, 

and lunch for the ones you pick off a dinner buffet.


But the questions in your concise cerebrum don't stop, 

you wonder,

how dare I compare a human to a fucking mosquito, 

or a goat, a cow, a pig, 

depending on which one appeases the idiosyncrasies

of the ones you bend your spine to, 

without getting money for it, that is?


Well, you discriminate by species, 

I discriminate by utility. 


And claiming superiority by association,

how dare you, I ask. 

Who do you think you are, 

some godman in a land that mistakes fear for faith?


Honestly, we've had too many of them,

and I have always had a kink for subtraction.


And now you're confused, 

as to when did this become 

about the things you've been taught

to not debate nor question, 

because idiocy is best served, 

when accountability is a missing father.


And now you're confused, 

how did this begin with me, 

and become about you? 

Because, 

you are synonymous with the antonym:

how something about someone

becomes all about you, 

all thanks to you!


This isn't a screenplay 

you are used to auditioning for.


In fact, right about now, 

you're questioning

why you didn't realise

the precise moment the story flipped.


But then, isn't that the story of your life anyway?


No, this whole charade doesn't have a point.

In case you were still wondering.

In fact it was never meant to have any reason or logic.

I just arranged random words in a manner

co-ordinated enough 

to confuse the fuck out

of your perception of language, 

while mimicking the very same manner, 

in which every shred of faith

was hammered into your marrows.


Thankfully for you, 

I don't have a lot of faith

in faith. 

Else, you'd have traded yours today.

The Stanza After Skin

Once you've spent years


unclothed,

unsheathed,

unhinged,


walking to the kitchen and back,

butt naked,


gone from cooking meals

to doing the dishes

to lying on the bed

staring at the ceiling

for no reason at all,


not a shred of fabric

between your skin

and hers,


you realise


how easily

people have peddled

sex for salvation,


mistaken

intercourse

for intimacy.



You wake up

to the quiet truth


that waking up

to bare bottoms

and open tops


was never,

by itself,


reason enough

to fuck.


Those who believe otherwise


are still learning

the difference

between access

and affection.


Because novelty

has an expiry date.


Tenderness doesn't.



Need

arrives

like a clock hand,


faithfully returning

to where it began.


Desire,

however,

has always been

a visitor.


It knocks.

It waits.

It is invited in.



You realise


the blemishes on her buttocks

resemble spines drawn on sand, 

as if finger impressions

left by

the undercurrents of the ocean 

beneath and beyond, 


the singular mole

at the south-western edge

of her left breast

resembles an island

still fighting 

to stay above water, 


how somehow,

even after years,

your breath

against her neck

still creates

a geography

of goosebumps.



You realise

intimacy was never

about two bodies

finding each other.

Bodies have always

known how to collide.


It was about two histories

learning

how to inhabit

the same silence.



Two people

shedding clothes

is easy.


Two people

losing disguises, 

revealing everything 

they spend years

pretending not to be, 


takes a long time.


Long enough

for ordinary

to become sacred.


Long enough

for belonging 

to stop needing

proof.



Sex is never finished

when the body is.


It continues


in the certainty

that tomorrow

you will still

walk naked

to the kitchen,


still steal from each other's plates,


still discover

new maps

on familiar skin.

Friday, 10 July 2026

Ice Cream

This afternoon,

I learnt

a scoop of ice cream

can be an unbearably long stretch of time.


This was supposed to be our treat —

to us,

from us,

for being us.


And yet,

here we were,

divided

by three scoops of Belgian chocolate.


She has never settled for one.


I have always found

two of the same

too lingering, 

and two different, 

too distracting.


We have rituals like that.


Like never having a meal

at the dining table,

always on the bed,

while trying to figure out

what should accompany us

from dinner

to dreamland.


She's never managed

to finish a movie,

let alone

a television series,

unbothered by sleep,

unhinged in determination.


She's a woman

of iron will,

make no mistake.


But the moment

food reaches

her stomach,

iron

remembers

how to melt.


I, on the other hand, 

am compulsive, 

in my need to see beginnings end.


We have rituals like that. 


Like how,

when she says

she wants coffee,


what she really wants

is coffee-flavoured milk.


She calls that abomination

coffee,


and calls coffee

an abomination

of humanity.


She has never quite understood

how anyone

could willingly savour bitterness, 


and yet


she chose

to go to bed

every night


with a man

who drinks

his coffee black,


as though

there were no other way.


She calls me

a psychopath

for that.


I call her

a psychopath


for sleeping

with her mouth

open wide enough


that an entire civilisation

of mosquitoes

could walk right in,


and walk right out, 

their stomachs full, 

fat with gratitude.


Today,

for the first time,

I met

a lazy Friday.


Even an empty one.


I never knew

Friday afternoons

could contain

so much silence.


And even though,

following ritual,


she spilled

ice cream

on her dress,


today

wasn't the day

I could laugh about it.


How could I,

having fought

with her

seventeen minutes earlier?


This is one

of our rituals too.


Our conversations 

and confrontations 

have always 

been married 

to each other,


the way

we are,

on the days

we aren't fighting.


Conversations,

if left unattended

for more than

twenty-one minutes,

have a peculiar habit

of becoming

confrontations.


Then

I blame her.

Then

she blames me.

Then

we both take turns

blaming ourselves,

while quietly insisting

the other

started it.


Then come

the apologies,

still pointing fingers,

only softer

than before.


Neither of us

ever remembers

the precise moment

the accusations

stop making sense,

and affection

quietly resumes

its ordinary duties.


Every time

we fight,


I discover

newer truths

about ice cream.